Social media: what it can cost your relationship

Social media has in many ways made communication and connection much easier than it ever was before. It reduces distances to a Skype call, and means that there is rarely a reason to not keep in touch with loved ones, our lives now neatly displayed in a digital version across Facebook, Instagram and Twitter, to name a few. This is a wonderful innovation to bring us closer together, however the Seventy Thirty Specialist Matchmakers look at the negative effect it can have on areas in intimate relationships with our partners.

* Time: Having constant access to material and information, can result in social media consuming much more time in everyday life then one realises. If you are not aware and do not keep track of this, it can land up taking away from the time you have to talk to your partner, and build the relationship.

*Distraction: How often have you lain in bed and been scrolling through Facebook, rather than taking that time to connect with your partner after a long day. Even if you are talking, are either of you really listening or trying to catch up with the latest news on social media? Put your phones down when you get into bed and do not pick them up again until the morning.

*Always Active: When was the last time you took some time out and thought, felt, focussed all your attention on your partner, or yourself? Social media has become an added drain as it is always active. Too often now days, if someone has time off, instead of investing it into relationships, it will be used to see what is happening in the greater world. Social media never turns off and this means that now we also too struggle to turn off. Look to press the power button and take time out.

*Privacy:  What happened in the past, could be left in the past, and we could move forward, and choose how to share those stories and memories. However, now as much of life is shared on the ever evolving face of social media, it can be there to stay. Now our past and present partners have found a place to meet – on the playing field of social media. This can lead to seeing things about your partners, or them about you, that you would prefer not to see or share. A good rule for this is do not snoop, as this raises paranoia and undermines trust, and think carefully before cataloguing your entire life online.

When it comes to relationships, keep strong boundaries. Set the time aside for your relationship and do not let that be eroded by distraction or constant activity. The person there in front of you, is much more deserving of your full attention, then the hundreds that surround you by the virtue of virtual reality.